you love birds'll be roadkill

So, as you may or may not know, I briefly dated a certain guy a few months ago, and he dumped me, and i have been badly sprung on him ever since.
well last night I went to the Bagel to meet my friend James, but James didn't show, so I went in alone. as it turns out, i came just in time to catch the last act, which was one of said guy's outfits.
So as I'm walking through the bar, I see the aforementioned and his long-legged soulmate girlfriend sitting on a bench. I didn't bother looking at em (cos it hurts, ya know), but as I was walking by, the girlfriend PUT OUT HER LEG and fuckin HALF TRIPPED ME. i guess it was under the pretense of friendliness, but obviously i didn't want to say hi to them, and what followed was proof of the meanness of the gesture: I look down at them and said hi, and they gave me the "we're a couple" look. Not just ANY "we're a couple look," either. Not the "you lost out" look or the "i'm way happier now" look or the "look at how much hotter my new bitch is" look. It was both of em giving me the "WE'RE IN LOVE, CMON 'N LOOK AT US, YOU POOR LONELY BASTARD!" look! a CRRUUUELLL look! with elements of the other three, but with two added layers of "YOU ARE CHOPPED LIVER" and "BUT I LIKE WATCHIN YOU SQUIRM!"

SOULMATES INDEED!
MAYBE IF YOU COMBINE YOURS BOTH YOU'LL COME UP WITH HALF!

IN OTHER NEWS:

GOnna eat a quesedilla!